i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
