Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize