I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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