Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
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