Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
