home. puking in laundry basket.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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