Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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