her vagine was all disorganized.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Randomize
