If i come over, it means nothing
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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