these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
