I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
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