It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
