If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
