More tranny stories later!
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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