After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
