What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize