yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
