Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize