so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
It's just like the Real World with babies
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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