It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
