C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
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