lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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