Cold hands, warm shart.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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