he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
