Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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