I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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