Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
