Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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