I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
