I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
