found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize