Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
