ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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