Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
