it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize