our cab driver is having phone sex.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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