I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
