It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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