it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize