I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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