I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
