that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
