I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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