Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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