So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
