How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I just googled if crying burns calories
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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