You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
