I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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