rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
