her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
