AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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