i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
