Porn is love you can see.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
