We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I pour the whiskey from now on
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize