Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
